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Memories in the Walls
Fours a real crowd so you gotta keep everything interesting. As always some people try way too hard while the rest zone out in their personal torture chamber of contentment and mind numbing safety. An adventure always involves a lot of having to do what you may not feel like doing to discover or win life changing advantage and wisdom. Real men find hardship a formidable challenge. Haunted by naked, sexually active ghosts. Everything they do is done with a lascivious flourish. Most people are completely oblivious to this aggressively self indulgent spiritual carnality. They dwell on little things, most of them of no consequence and pointedly ignore life with their face aggressively facing television or their nose leaving shiny trails through a lot of expensive books. The playful, whorish spirits stare into the back of your head when you're trying to pray. They pretend to drop down on us from trees, to catch us naked in the shower, to be a good idea at a bad time. These lusty wraiths
FIRST GRADE MIX-UP!
Kindergarten in 1968-69 wasn't so very bad. I'll write about it some time, but this story concerns a traumatic event which happened shortly after that that really freaked me out. I'm assuming it was the result of some bureaucratic mix-up, but considering my history, who can say for sure? This one is about my first day of the first grade. The first day of school I went to the class assigned to me. All the kids seemed a bit bigger than they should have been. I felt very uncomfortable. The teacher wasn't making much sense to me, talking about a bunch of stuff I could hardly understand, but saying them as though I should be familiar with what she was speaking about. I was very quiet as a little child, even more so considering the weird situation I then found myself confronted with. The other kids were pleasant enough to me, but I felt oddly out of place. Later on in the day the Teacher passed out blank sheets of ruled paper, and announced we were having some kind of pop quiz or
The Dead Cat
"THE DEAD CAT!" The year was 1971, or possibly '72. It was an early spring evening and it was still light outside when I noticed a dead cat lying in the middle of the street. It looked just like it was sleeping, except that it's eyes were opened and they were two gruesome gobs of crimson gore! As I stood their looking at this inert feline, a woman walked up the sidewalk and, from the other side of the street asked, while assuming an anxious pose not very unlike Munch's painting of 'the Scream', "Is that cat dead?", to which I confidently replied, sounding to anyone who could hear me like the most authoritative six year old on the planet, "Yeah. He's all dead and everything!" The woman's face then collapsed into an expression which frantically radiated helpless horror as she replied, "Oh my God! I'll go find someone with a shovel to get him off the street!", after which she scurried purposefully away leaving me alone, still standing in front of the dead cat. Then along came a hippy, all
Eddie
"EDDIE" 2/9/09 Up until the middle of grade school, I was a gravely quiet child, and I don't recall having many friends, but I recall paying close attention to all that happened around me. There was one kid in my first grade class that grated on my nerves. His name was Eddie. For a first-grader, he certainly put on airs. A real pretentious little punk he was. I simply couldn't stand him. Whenever the teacher, Ms. Nezmith, would ask the children if there were any questions after a lecture, his hand was always the first to shoot up, and when he was called upon, he always said the same thing, "To be, or not to be. THAT is the question." I really hated that guy. One time we had one of those special evenings at school when the Parents visited our classroom. It must have been fall because the Teacher had us all draw pictures of kites to hang on the walls for decoration. Eddie's composition was just as gaudy as you'd expect it to be, with swirly little lines all over the sky. I asked Eddie
© 2014 - 2024 Ron-Tweedie
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